People ask me why I have not gotten the arrange marriage or why I am single. Simple answer I am all about the money.
Every since I was young. I have seen the struggles in my family had or people in general. I seen countless movies, read a lot of materials about life, and family issues. I have found that depending on self values and morel codes. People will enjoy their own personal choice and then regret it afterwards. The reason I say this. There are people I known that gotten arrange marriages and assuming that they will have a good time. If not, they will go a different path.
I have seen mixed cultures and arranged marriage work. Myself personally, I have felt that arrangements work if that person knows the person way in advance at a young age. People may have advise or said this to me. The only way a marriage works if both parties are in the boat, and share the same love and compassion.
While growing up parents have known that there are people that can make a suitable family extension. I have understood that for awhile. My mind set is already in the bouncing around to go towards neither option. As my decision over the years have been bad choices. Such as work life, social activities (missed out on SAA), working to much, caring for people who I thought was important. Things like these were all over the place. Most people have already focused on their own needs by the age. I have never had the opportunity to focus.
People are groomed at their own phases of life. I have grown to fast and made bad choices. People older than me tell me "it takes time" or "you will know when you are older." What do they know those inconsiderate ass wholes. Growing with older generations and being a transitional age person who works with all generations. I seem to forgotten who I am.
I get the feeling while wondering my life. I lack the education of social norms. It is not high school in real life. One wrong move can ruin your social life or norm. I had to punch an Asian dude out due to his mouth. Just because he was saying things, and calling my bluff. Overall, I have to say people who started out from exploring life, and then becoming somewhat adults. I call them out. Do they really have a perfect life? I think not?
Gosh that was hard to say out-loud.
Whatever the case maybe, my personal values are being affected no matter what I do. Going back to thought in import or home grown is a hard choice to make. There is additional issues while importing. Such as, sponsorship, ESL, culture, income, and housing. Soul responsibility of multiple individuals can drain a person out mentally and physically. I guess what I am saying. I would rather not import a girl from my homeland due to I enjoy my own simple value life.
Having additional responsibilities in another land can cause additional problems such as financial drainage. By all means, the money your are sending over, for the family can be scamming you in the end who knows. Foreign life can be different and difficult at times. If this back in the 70s, 80s, or 90s. The important culture values will be strong, and people will be more in passionate about each other or have a simple transition bringing in their spouse's family over.
If I was born in the 70s or 80s. I might go and import a girl if I had an opportunity. Now, people look at income, housing, if he or she can handle family drama or support their man's choices in careers. This is another reason why I do not want to import.
I can see myself in leaning towards home grooming. I have had a conversation with a person recently, and if in fact I go and import a person. I would need someone with a clear mind, and a lot of hope then become a home groomed person. What is defined home groomed is someone who has the same values as their partner, and will look after them no matter the circumstances, and someone who was born or raised in the same country as yourself. If this person is foreign I can shape this person in my image.
People keep saying to me go back home and find a girl. I tend to brush them off. As I known what type of people they are. As I had multiple females that were from foreign land. Their mind is different.
In all cases, foreign environment can get a lot of issues. The person can try to change you in their image as well. They want you to forget your birth right, and manage their own values and country.
In the end, I would rather be single and alone to deal rather than dealing with drama from my own homeland.
My life isn't complete. I realize that I have a long ways to go, but those have partners congratulations in finding their true love.
Mistry Man,
Out and about
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